


That's What I Like

by cottonspore



Category: Shin Sangokumusou | Dynasty Warriors
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Humor, Romance, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-12
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-12-14 07:40:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11778489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cottonspore/pseuds/cottonspore
Summary: Cool jewelry shining so bright from the local lay-away friendly store,Strawberry champagne on ice since it will be on someone else's tab.Guo Jia is on the prowl for his next lady to please but not without complication.





	That's What I Like

**Author's Note:**

> So I finally broke my 6 month streak of listening to Hamilton to have Bruno Mars infect me with his song, “That’s What I Like” and I was trying to write up a different story but this song gave me a new idea ;) Hahaha, so, this story is based on this song as portrayed by our favorite flirtatious strategist~

 

_COUGH COUGH WHEEEEZE_

“Are you sure you want to head out tonight? *cough* You know we have an important meeting in the morning, right?”

“Ha, are you sure you don’t want a swig of that cough syrup in the cabinet?”

“Erm, yes, I’ve told you several times already- oh, I get it..”

“Yep, so there goes my answer as well, pal.”

Guo Jia finished straightening out his attire as he shot Guo Huai a playful smirk. He tucked his tie into his vest in such a way that the swirling trails of indigo would catch the light and captivate whoever eyes caught sight. The gold watch he rented, er, bought 3 hours ago? The ladies wouldn’t be able to keep their hands off of it. Or at least be very tempted to touch it. The pants he wore weren’t exactly form fitting but tight enough to give the ladies something to swoon over. With a flick of the wrist, his hair would fly back and land perfectly in position – plopping on top of his head only to slope back into his face – helping any woman in her right mind deepen her infatuation with him.

“You *cough* keep it up, the boss won’t have his most *cough* MVP around to come up with any more brilliant pitches.” Guo Huai warned, trying to suppress any further coughing by holding his chest.

“Oh come on, it’s just a cock-and-tail party of sorts,” Guo Jia reasoned. “I’m just going to have some fun.”

“A _what?_ ”

“A cocktail party of sorts, hehe.”

“A cocktail party of sorts?”

“Yeeeah, a..party of sorts.”

“Why is it just a party of sorts now?”

“Because it’s just a party!”

“Now just a party?”

“Ugh, why does it matter! How about this – I’m going out. I’ll probably be out for most of the night so if you want anything to eat, I’d suggest you call for some delivery.” Guo Jia scooped up his jacket, but not without looking in the mirror as he did so.

“Well, knowing *cough* you, you might need some, er, supervision to keep you in line.” Guo Huai stood from where he sat at his desk, no longer interested in the paperwork that he was tending to before Guo Jia caught his attention.

“Ha, well, I guess  I could use a wingman. Well alright, if you’re planning to come, you need to do something, hmm, do something a little different with this,” Guo Jia gestured with a circling finger as he eyed Guo Huai’s typical work outfit.

“With this?” Guo Huai tracked what Guo Jia was circling and lifted his tie.

“No, all of it.”

“My entire tie? Well, I didn’t think you meant only a portion of it..” Guo Huai began to undo his tie, somewhat offended but also thankful that he had a friend like Guo Jia to help him with his fashion.

“No no, not just your tie, you entire out- ugh, never mind. You look fine, buddy.” Guo Jia sighed. “You look like the perfect wingman.”

“So what did I need to fix?” Guo Huai asked, deeper in confusion.

“Fix me up with a ride,” Guo Jia dug through his wallets and pulled out some expired bus passes, triggering his memory that his only mode of transportation was that of the public.

“A ride? Sure, I guess.”

 

* * *

 

The bar wasn’t packed but it was busy. Many of the waiters weaved in and out of the tables and rooms like electrons in an atom; all tending to the patrons without bumping into each other and always on the move. There were several booths filled with people who looked like they worked for business firms of sorts and then there were the occasional loners enjoying a drink and appetizer to themselves. Certain areas of the bar had a backlit color fill the rooms – red, green, blue, and cyan – representative of some of the clientele that frequented the place. The bar was stationed in the middle of the establishment – rounding out to a circle that allowed an almost perfect view of the rooms and people and an extensive view of the many liquors lining its shelf. Guo Jia looked around as he tried to scope out his first snag of the night.

_COUGH COUGH WHEEEEZE_

But not before his wingman coughed away any game.

“Hey uh, pal, why don’t we grab some drinks or something? Let’s just enjoy the scene a bit.” Guo Jia suggested. He figured once Guo Huai sat down, he wasn’t likely to get back up and wander around.

The two made their way to the bar and sat down where two adjacent seats were empty. The bartender spotted the new faces and made his way over to serve them.

“Welcome sirs, what can I get ya?” the bartender asked while polishing a glass in hand.

“Hey, lemme have a martini and my pal here can get an Old Fashioned.” Guo Jia answered before Guo Huai needed the typical 10 minutes to make up his mind.

“Alright, coming up in no time, sirs.” The bartender whisked around to the other side of the circle to get the alcohol needed for the drinks while Guo Jia took the opportunity to find his first flower to pluck. Out in the dance lounge was a couple of women taking up the scene with tame-but-still-somewhat-suggestive dancing. The current backlight was blue, which was the green light for Guo Jia since blue light ladies were his favorite. With his martini in hand, Guo Jia took to the dance floor after spotting a few dancers who piqued his interest – particularly one with the long, cascading hair.

Guo Huai took a small sip from his glass once the bartender served him up. Guo Huai was still grappling with the fact that Guo Jia couldn’t have possibly have known what drink he wanted, so why would he just arbitrarily order a drink for him – especially without even looking at the menu! Then he decided he’ll just let it go, since, ehh, having an Old Fashioned doesn’t sound like that bad of an idea, and it is _the_ drink to get at the bar occasionally. Or sometimes. Well, may it’s _the_ drink to get always. Ahh either way, Guo Jia didn’t make a bad choice but next time, he wants to order his drink for himself.

“How’s it going, my darling lovebird?” Guo Jia decided that was the perfect name since the dancer he oiled up on was wearing a feather hairpiece as her ponytail cascaded from underneath - like the plumage of the peacock but a bird nonetheless.

The dancer didn’t acknowledge Guo Jia, but he took that as a challenge.

“You know, what’s a lovebird to do without the other to form a pair? How about we fly out of here and roost at my place?” Guo Jia managed to say while dancing without spilling his martini. With the blue light being the only somewhat decent lighting on the dance floor, it was hard to truly make out what the dancer truly looked like. Whoever this girl was, she was kinda tall, like, much taller than she appeared from a distance, but it was not a deal breaker. Even though he tried to grind on her, she was pretty powerful with her hips – like maybe she was a dancer and dominating the dance floor came naturally as a sport. She didn’t say anything but judging from her dancing, she obviously enjoyed the company.

Deciding to go in for the kill by locking eyes, Guo Jia maneuvered his way around to face her, only to be dismayed that the girl he was dancing with wasn’t the one he fell in love with from afar; actually, the girl he was dancing with wasn’t a girl at all!

“Oooh, were you dazzled by my hips or by the beauty and grace of Zhang He?” the man crooned as he continued to sway back and forth like that of pendulum in hypnosis.

But the seduction attempt had failed since Guo Jia had already turned away as he sipped on his martini, already off the dance floor. Zhang He looked around but could not find Guo Jia in sight.

 

* * *

 

 

Making sure to conserve his martini, Guo Jia took only a few, small sips as he stormed away from the dance floor. If he was going to have moments like that all night, then he couldn’t afford to just gulp down his pricey drink. Oh, that and because he didn’t have any cash and Guo Huai didn’t know that he was already paying for their tab - so to keep racking up charges would ensure no future night-outs.

After his embarrassing encounter on the dance floor, Guo Jia scouted for a spot in a lonely section of the pub where he could recuperate from his loss but still be able to a snag a potential win for the night. Over in the lounge area was a woman sitting by her lonesome. Even though she had one drink in hand, she had several empty glasses surrounding her on the table as if she had an unquenchable thirst for scotch. Now it was not his style at all to take advantage of drunk women since consent was always a must – if not _the_ number one rule to being a gentleman; but out of his own considerate gentlemanliness, he needed the lady to remember the great night he was going to give her. Guo Jia sidled in beside her as he pulled up a seat beside her at the table.

“Having a rough night, sweetheart?” Guo Jia cooed as he sat his drink down, having to almost shove her empty glasses out of the way in order to do so.

The room was again backlit to a deep, rich blue as if the lights represented the lowering inhibitions between the two. Though the room was dimly lit, the features of the woman he sat beside seemed to glow in the darkness. Her hair was cut in a wavy, asymmetrical bob that framed one side of her face better than the other and her eyes gleamed with sadness as she swirled the leftover alcohol in her glass.

“A rough night is an understatement.”

“Well I’m sure I could make it better if you want.” Guo Jia tipped off a nearby server for another scotch as they rushed by with other drinks in hand.

“Heh, I doubt it.” The sad lady gulped down the remainder of the alcohol in her glass to make way for the new glass that was just sat down on the table. “I doubt it … unless you want to be my partner in crime.”

Guo Jia perked up a little bit. “Partner in crime, you say?”

“That’s if you’re up for it.”

“Well, if we’re going to be partners, it’s important to know my accomplice of love’s name, right?” Guo Jia swirled his finger on the top of one of the empty glasses.

“Wang Yi,” she replied before taking another gulp of alcohol.

“Ahh, and a gorgeous name for a gorgeous partner.”

Wang Yi rolled her eyes but smiled a little before speaking. “You know, you’re the first.”

Guo Jia’s finger stopped mid-swirl as his mouth opened but sharply closed in order to conceal his sudden excitement. Just to be sure as to what she meant, he needed clarification. “First, huh? First for love? Or the making of it?”

Wang Yi started to giggle as softly as drunk person could. “You wanna be partners. No no, we _are_ partners now. Partners in crime. I didn’t think you had it in you-”

Guo Jia almost looked offended but didn’t allow the comment to throw him off his game as he interrupted. “Well I have a lot to offer if you’re ready to go now.” He dug into his pocket and flashed Guo Huai’s car keys.

Wang Yi stared at the keys in awe and smiled. “So you’re really all in for this?!”

Guo Jia stood then leaned in to Wang Yi’s face. “As ready as this 8-inch will ever be.” The crude comment would not have been complete without an infamous Guo Jia smirk.

“I’m so excited! Okay, sooo here’s where we’re going to kill him, a-and this is where we’ll bury his b-body,” Wang Yi beamed as she took out her phone to display a map of the city. “T-though I’m..not sure what a, ahhh shit I’m so drunk, hahaha okay one moment. Okay, sooo I’m not sure what good an 8-inch, er, shhhovel will do, b-but if you’re confident, in your abilities-”

“WHOA WHOA, WHAT THE FU-” Guo Jia looked around to see heads turned their way then lowered his voice to a loud whisper. “What the fuck are you talking about lady!?”

“P-partner in crime, I’m only filling you in on the details of theee, t-the operation,” Wang Yi was taken aback by the sudden change of temperament of her accomplice.

“WHAT THE-!! When I said I’ll be your partner in crime, I meant it was going to be a crime of love! Not murder! What the hell!!” Guo Jia whispered through gritted teeth and a fake smile.

Wang Yi gave an overexaggerated nod as she agreed with what he said. “Well, well yeah. You love vengeance as much as I do, right?” Before Guo Jia could even say anything, she interrupted. “NO! because, because I love vengeance the mostest, and, and, a-and you’re not going to get in the way of, me, you’re not gonna get in the way of this!”

Wang Yi finalized her words with remainder of her drinking, knocking back her glass until it was empty like the others. Once her vision was no longer obstructed with the glass in her face, she looked around to find that her partner-in-crime had absconded from her side.

 

* * *

 

 

After nearly being played into partaking in a murder, Guo Jia snatched up his martini and disappeared into a fancy lounge of sorts. There was supposed to be two bouncers guarding the door for selective entry, but the rotund bouncer was busy snatching up all of the food that passed by on platters and the burlier bouncer was preoccupied with stopping him.

Easily slipping by the two, Guo Jia found himself in a plush, lap of luxury with no one else around. Assuming it to be the VIP suite, the room looked to be the same size as the building itself - with several smaller rooms and a mini bar within. Attempting to look as inconspicuous as possible in case someone was present, Guo Jia browsed around the bar to help himself to the ‘free’ alcohol. On the bar counter was a credit card - more than likely left by the person holding the suite – but it soon found a new home in Guo Jia’s pocket.

As Guo Jia was about to pick out a liquor worth more than everything he was wearing, a cold and icy stare stopped him mid-reach.

“What the hell are you doing in here? Guards-” Before she could call for the two bouncers outside, Guo Jia covered her mouth. Thinking quick on the spot, Guo Jia did what he did best.

“What the hell am I doing here? Girl, I am here to treat you. What are _you_ doing?” Guo Jia feigned his annoyance by turning the golden question onto her.

The angry woman snatched his hands off of her mouth and started her way toward the door. Though she wasn’t playing around with the intruder, he felt that she was playing around with his heart. It was something about the way she yelled at him that made his heart jump. It was something about her cold glare and cute mole above her mouth that looked like perfection. It was something about the way she treated him that turned him on.

_There was something about her that he just had to have her._

“Hey hey hey hey, wait, just wait a minute!” Guo Jia blocked her path before she could get halfway across the room.

“Get out of my way! You’re probably poor and couldn’t afford to pay for any damages if I were to break a _nail_ when I slap you.” The threatening woman declared.

“Lady Zhen Ji, is everything okay in there?” asked one of the bouncers as a crash of plates could be heard right outside the door. “Ahh dammit Xu Zhu, focus!”

“Lady Zhen Ji, more dim sum will be on the way! Please be patient, hehe.” The bouncer so-called Xu Zhu announced before more dishes hit the ground.

Lady Zhen Ji rolled her eyes and brought her attention back to Guo Jia, only for him to cover her mouth again and take them deeper into the suite away from prying eyes outside the door. Right as they got to a chaise lounge seat in the back, she jerked his hands off of her and slapped him, which indeed resulted in a broken nail. Though she was fuming, he couldn’t help but smile.

“You want to do it aga-”

Before he could offer her another shot, he was slapped again.

“You made me break a nail, you broke piece of shit!”

“I could break off a little of something else if it would make you feel better.”

_SMACK_

“You have no tact. Once my husb-”

“Shh shh shh, take it easy and let me treat you to something nice.” Guo Jia again interrupted. “Husband, has-been, whatever he is, I’m sure he’s the last person on your mind with how angry you seem to be.”

Guo Jia has no idea who her husband might be, but with his experience with women, he could only hope he was playing the game right in just taking whatever she lashed out at him with. Though Zhen Ji looked familiar to him, he couldn’t quite place her face but hopefully after tonight, his would be the only one she would remember.

Though the likelihood of that being the case was incredibly low.

Guo Jia whipped out his wrist to show off the pricey watch he had rented just hours ago, pretending to check the time. It immediately caught the attention of Zhen Ji.

“It’s not quite eleven yet, but we can still have some fun.” Guo Jia observed before hiding his watch under his sleeve. “Just didn’t want to start the party too early.” Guo Jia walked over to the bar and began to pour some drinks. All of the drinks lining the shelves were equivalent to several months of paychecks, but thanks to whoever just left their card, it was equivalent to whatever is in their bank account.

“Okay, so before I request my bodyguards to throw you out, who are you?” Zhen Ji asked, fighting back the urge to smile in the slightest. “Your tie tells me you work for Wei Inc. and the fact that you have a watch like that shows you make a decent amount of money. Wu or Shu could only dream to make as much.” Zhen Ji took a sip of wine that Guo Jia had poured for her while he took a seat beside her with bourbon in hand.

“Ha, well, I’m the guy who helped Wei sink its roots into Xiapi, Guandu, and Mt. Bailang. I’m somewhat new to the team, but Cao Cao has a sharp eye for strategy and marketing. What can I say?” Guo Jia couldn’t help but gloat just a little bit.

“Oh?” Zhen Ji mused, but keeping her poker face in check. “You work for Cao Cao directly?”

“Yeah, and boy is it work. I mean, it’s not Cao Cao that’s the problem, it’s his schmeck of a son.” Guo Jia sneered. “I could easily surpass him in the company, but I can’t bring myself to embarrass him in front of his father.”

Zhen Ji laid back fully in the lounge chair and began to fan herself with the feather fan she had nearby the seat. If there was any sign of amusement on her face, it was clear as ever this time. Guo Jia took this to mean he was impressing her. Zhen Ji’s glance would occasionally fall behind Guo Jia, but she didn’t make it too noticeable to him.

Zhen Ji grinned as she prodded for more questions. “Hm, a schmeck, huh? I know a little bit about him. Don’t you think his ponytail is the dumbest thing ever? I easily get him confused with Zhang He, except Zhang He has so much more muscle mass and charm. It would be almost an insult to Zhang He!” Guo Jia only laughed a shallow laugh as a quick flashback from earlier tonight filled his mind.

“Aha, yeeeah.”

“What would you say about his fashion? Deplorable, am I right?” Zhen Ji laughed behind her fan. A faint crackle could be heard from behind Guo Jia but he was too busy trying to entertain Lady Zhen Ji.

“Pffft, you’re telling me! I’m almost willing to buy the guy a tie or two if it meant that he could at least coordinate every once in a while.” Guo Jia laughed as he inched a little closer towards Zhen Ji from his chair.

Guo Jia gave a small smile once there was silence between the two of them and dug into his pocket to pull out a credit card, careful of not revealing the name but instead showing the side with the magnetic strip. “How about we get out of here and go somewhere cozier, like my place? Here, take all of the bottles you want and I’ll just put it on my card.”

Guo Jia stood up with the card in hand, a smirk on his face, and his ego off the charts. Getting ready to walk over to the bar and flashing the card one more time as to validate that he got the tab, another hand snatched the card from between his fingers and pushed Guo Jia hard enough for him to fall onto the floor. Zhen Ji yawned as she closed her fan and sat up, getting ready to leave herself.

“Honey, you heard what he said. You’re the Zhang He of manly men and you have no fashion sense. A man who truly loves me wouldn’t allow someone to say that i’m married to anyone less than a man.”

“You’re the one who said all of that!” The man who Zhen Ji had been describing had Guo Jia’s tie clenched in one fist with his other fist ready to strike him in the face.

“Well, you’re acting like it’s true.” Zhen Ji drank the rest of her wine and brushed herself off as she got up to leave.

“Oh, so that’s how you view me, huh? Well how about you go home with this office grunt after I kick his ass, and find a new place to sleep? I’m sure laying your head on 100% polyester pillows will make you think twice about talking shit about my tie!”

“Cao Pi, I’m done with your attitude. You still have yet to prove me wrong and instead prove me right with the way you’re _not_ pummeling this guy.” Zhen Ji sighed with agitation and walked over to the bar for a couple bottles of wine.

“What the hell does it take to please you, woman?!” Cao Pi bellowed before his fist finally connected with Guo Jia’s face. Zhen Ji paused for a moment, but rolled her eyes as she collected her third bottle.

“You punched him as if he talked about your mom, not your money.”

Cao Pi raised another fist to correct his error in punching last time, but before he could fix his mistake, Guo Jia raised both hands in protest.

“Whoa whoa, buddy! Hey, um, _look_ , how about we settle this a different way? Aha, y-you know, without you punching me repeatedly in the face? Letting me go home without shagging your wife? Not telling your dad about any of this? How about it?

Cao Pi and Zhen Ji exchanged looks once Guo Jia made his proposal.

“Either you redeem yourself or I’m going home and you’re father will learn that you don’t know how to spend money.” Zhen Ji asserted.

Guo Jia looked Cao Pi square in the eyes until an incoming fist became bigger and the only thing he could see was stars.

 

* * *

 

 

It’s been over an hour and you know what? With much debate, Guo Jia was in the wrong and he needed to know it. Every time they go to the bar, he always orders him an Old Fashioned. Suppose one night he feels like mixing it up? That’s why it takes so much time to decide – which drink should he get in order to mix it up a little.

Guo Huai turned to face where his buddy would have been, but to his dismay, he still wasn’t back. He was getting up to leave, but only under the watchful eye of the bartender was he able to leave the immediate area. After coughing up the money for both his and Guo Jia’s tab, that is.

Guo Huai decided it was best to just leave since there _was_ an important meeting in the morning and he had to get enough sleep. He dug into his vest pocket, then his front pockets in his pants then the back – only to unsuccessfully locate his keys. Guo Huai sighed a heavy sigh once he realized that Guo Jia had his keys and he couldn’t leave without him.

Turning right back around to the bar, Guo Huai flagged the bartender over and took a seat. The bartender patiently stood as he awaited a command, but soon grew restless when Guo Huai didn’t say anything for several minutes.

“Good sir, would like the regular?

“Hmm, I’ll uh, *cough* I’ll take a look at your menu please.”

“Would you like an Old Fashioned? That seems to be your drink of choice, good sir.”

“I know what I’m about. *cough cough* And I need some time to think it over.”

With a deep sigh, the bartender stood at stand-by.

“Yes, good sir.”

**Author's Note:**

> 1 hour and 13 minutes later, Guo Huai finally decided on an Old Fashioned c:


End file.
